Forgoing a Yaya While Transitioning from 1 to 2 Kids
Growing up, I was under the care of a string of yayas—stay-in nannies—while both of my parents worked. It was one thing I took for granted, assuming my peers had the same setup. However, as I started visiting several of my friends' houses, I realized that wasn't the case.
Having a yaya felt like a privilege, as sourcing out the services of one could get expensive. Now that I’m a parent myself, I realized that having a stay-at-home parent is an even rarer privilege, especially in an economy as bad as we currently have.
Our First Foray Into Hiring Yayas
When our first baby was born, we had already hired a yaya after months of careful searching. Unfortunately, she only lasted a week before we realized something felt off.
The yayas we hired after her weren’t any better; none of them even made it to the end of the week.
But after my parents helped with the vetting, we finally found a yaya we could trust. She was younger than our earlier hires, but she proved to be capable and dependable.
She stayed with us for nearly two years before deciding to pursue a different path in life. By then, the pandemic had begun, and with lockdowns and travel restrictions in place, we had no choice but to forgo hiring another yaya.
We took it in stride, however. Both my husband and I were working from home (like the rest of the world, lol). And we were blessed to have a daughter who was so well-behaved and easy to manage.
For years, that became our setup: just the three of us helping one another. Even our daughter, who was a toddler then, was always eager to be our “little helper.”
The Decision to Forgo Childcare Help
When my daughter turned six, we learned we were expecting again. It was unplanned, so money was tight. And with our new home, we didn't have the extra room to house a stay-in yaya.
And so the decision was made: we'd forgo hiring one.
It felt like a huge gamble. Two young kids without childcare help—was that even possible? And with me working a remote job on top of that?
But one thing my husband and I pride in ourselves is that we always make it work, even if the odds seem not in our favor.
We worked out a system that let us juggle everything as best we could.
Some days were smooth; others were chaotic. There were moments when a toddler demanded attention right as an important task started, or when work had to be squeezed into the quiet pockets of nap time.
It wasn’t perfect, but we made it work—one day, one adjustment at a time.
The Financial Advantages of Being Yaya-Less
Wages for household help have increased in recent years, especially with inflation and the overall state of the economy. Because of that, hiring a yaya simply wasn’t financially feasible for us anymore.
The currency, however, was time and effort.
Without a yaya, every chore and every childcare responsibility fell on us. There were no extra hands to help with cooking, cleaning, or keeping an eye on the kids while we worked. It meant juggling work deadlines with diaper changes, school routines, and household tasks.
But it also forced us to be more intentional about how we managed our time and resources. We learned to simplify—planning meals ahead, dividing chores more clearly, and letting go of the idea that everything in the house had to be perfect.
Financially, the savings were significant. Without the additional expense of salary, food, and other costs that come with having a stay-in helper, we were able to allocate our money toward more pressing needs for our growing family.
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In the end, going yaya-less wasn’t the easy path, but it became the right one for our family at this stage of our lives.
It taught us to be more resourceful, more patient, and more present with one another.
While having extra help will always be a privilege many families rely on, we learned that with a lot of teamwork, flexibility, and a bit of chaos along the way, it’s possible to build a system that works—even if it looks different from what you once imagined.
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